My audio response is a rewritten version of chapter 10 from the readers' personal perspective. You're invited to click the hyperlink above to hear the audio version, or you may read the written version below. The choice is yours! In either case, Enjoy!
Hello. My new name is "The Board"-- the board on which the whole game is being played... I'm that person who has renamed herself as a means of transforming herself and the world in lieu of accepting the way things are that offers no possibility. Like, the way I tend to be when things don't go my way? when I'm angry and others (like my spouse and children) are not seeing things or doing things "my way?" when no ones willing to cooperate or even see things "half my way?" when nothing or nobody's moving and I feel that all of my efforts are worthless and I therefore, have reached my wits end...?"
I therefore, have transformed from this mentality of fault and blame, of pointing blame on others (or myself) for my own self-satisfaction, to one who makes a difference, one who sees the entire picture as a whole, who instead, repairs breakdowns in relationships, presents no obstacles to others and names myself as the instrument that makes ALL relationships become partnerships... because in essence, I am the framework for everything that happens in my life AND I am responsible for everything that happens in my life. With my renewed and transformed mentality, my spirit is whole and leaves me free to choose again! Besides, apportioning blame only divides and is an effort to keep a level playingfield of fairness... But my renewed mental strength is focused on perpetual integration. I no longer care to break down relationships in my life because of my old "calculating self" who once lived predominantly in "fault and blame" (especially when its NOT my fault).
My graduated way of thinking reminds me of 2 very small, yet very powerful words that restore broken down relationships or ones in the process of breaking down: "I'm sorry." As The Board, apologizing now comes so easily for me, especially with Rule #6 also in perspective, I choose to rethink things without concentrating so much on myself. As The Board (even in a leadership role) I can swallow my pride and write a letter of apology to someone who's subordinate to me, that I know I openly offended instead of finding reasons to convince myself that what I did was right because I'm in charge and they'll eventually "come around..." As The Board, my apologies are now sincere, authentic, genuine, and non-manipulative. The Board allows me to come "face to face" with ways I may have indirectly hindered my spouse and yet willingly apologize so that we can build upon new distinctions that we formulate together because any stumbling blocks that are in my way, are also in his AND only I can remove them...
As The Board, I don't have to have the last word, I don't always have to be right, and everything doesn't always have to be done my way, because like Rule #6, "I'm not all that". Occasionally, things that are unjust and unfair will prevail in my life, but as The Board, I factor all things into the equation. In so doing, I will soar on my journey of transformation and development with others--a renewed, mature mentality that does not "manage" relationships just to avoid conflict... because the barriers that may be causing any conflict have to first be canceled within me; And then I can extend the courage and compassion that others may need... Thus, I am rewarding myself with "self-respect" and I'm making a difference so that others may count on me to clear the pathways for accomplishment.
(This chapter meant so much to me, that I chose to hear myself make these confessions as a part of my personal "transformation!")
All quotes and paraphrases were taken from The Art of Possibility: Transforming Professional & Personal Life. Zander & Zander, 2000 pgs. 146-159
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